Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
just credit carded her and her mom at the same time... that drunk. get on my level
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Ugh I need to clean my floors/walls/ I actually don't understand why boys get drunk and pee on things
Next time one of us has a party everybody has to wear a diaper. But actually you just need a shit ton of disinfectant wipes and maybe a hazmat suit.
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
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