I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
We bought only tequila and Twister. And you're STILL surprised you got pregnant?
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
