I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
