Moan for me like Helen Keller
I just realized that if I marry him I will have the same last name as spiderman. this makes my decision so much harder.
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Sorry no. I've already promised my first single hookup to somebody.
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
So i woke up this morning to find my boss passed out on my living room floor.. Awkward? Haha
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize