How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
All I remember was my mom walking through the door, and then me asking her if she wanted a hit.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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