I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
After I tried for five minutes to hang my beer from the coat hanger in the bathroom , I have realized I am drunk
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
And theres a reasonable expectation that if you're fighting over a pair of yoga pants on the ground at VS someones gonna videotape it
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
mate iv just woke up in the garden. either help me inside or bring out my vodka
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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