I CAN MOONWALK!
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Nick's drunk off his ass and Kyle just Texted me and all he said was "butt pirates from space".
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
That's when I realized I was probably naked in the wrong bed
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
Consume your own penis you ugly freak.
Randomize
