Annihilated within 20 minutes of arriving on Saturday, proceeded to hook up with him half a dozen times/almost have sex in the shed. Later on I text his boyfriend letting him know he's okay and that he's asleep next to me. If I could parlay this skill into a vital component of national security I'd be the Jack Bauer of homewrecking. Diner later?
after giving me morning oral, he left saying "hate to eat and run but..." oh yeah, he's getting a second date.
she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
Thank you for holding my vodka while the police let me ride their horse.
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
Someone had to wrestle her in the chocolate pool, I'm glad I was man enough to step up and do it
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