i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
Yeah i'm definitely friends with drunk kyle, not sober kyle.
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
found a ham sandwich in the elevator it tasted so hungry and it was still fresh. dont be mad at me. you know you love ham.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Life lesson today, a six foot hot guy I meet at a party CANNOT fit on my bike with me.
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
