Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
yea but i missed the pot and poured the boiling water on my dick. shit hurts. aint nothin easy about that mac
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
Lest it die in the depths of eternal drunken recall denial...we peed in the street. Middle of the street. Simultaneously. Peed. Street. Middle of street.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
I'm not totally useless... You can use me as an example of what not to do
There is a french fry attached to my steering wheel and a note that says "eat me yum yum" can you explain this?
Randomize
