Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I will not fill you in on the details until we get back, so do not ask. I got peed on by the girl I was hooking up with last night.
I was thinking about getting her an edible arrangement for an engagement gift. You want in?
I'm buying her a drink and not telling her to dump his ass. that's my gift.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
We're sitting on the kitchen floor drinking and talking about mounting real light sabers to the dog's head.
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