Swine flu is the new snow day.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE GAY FRIEND?!?!
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I have post one night stand depression
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
Randomize