drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
There's a wake for a coworker on 420 during te time of 420... Hoping everyone will be too sad to notice how high I am.
Oh my god. My pre-date bowl for nerves tuned into "I'm too high for this date" he kept talking about trucks and I couldn't stop making racial slurs.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
They don't really make a "hey I'm fucking your ex wife" card do they ?
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