why the FUCK would i wear makeup on my vagina!?
She was so drunk that I kept trying to switch out her wine for water. Sort of like Jesus, but in reverse.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Help me help you realize you are a moron
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
