no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
you're putting all your eggs in a very hungover basket
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
Be subtle and tell lucas that he should sleep here tonight. And by subtle, i mean show him this text...
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize