Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
She called us while she was having sex to ask if we remembered to feed the cat
I dont understand how her boyfriend puts up with her weirdness
For future reference.... When you take a beer out of a 6pack... You don't insert your phone as a substitute.
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
I deserve to be covered in dicks
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
When i was tripping hard i was banging Jeff's roommate and her room turned into Hogwarts
Also when we were banging i thought my high school librarian was perched up on top of the stereo like a gargoyle but it ended up just being her cat
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Randomize