I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
Between cock and motorcycle I'm glad I don't have to sit at work tomorrow
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
Randomize
