Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
theyre doing shots to celebrate her boob jobs anniversary.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
so how about you dont randomly call my mother during parties?
Yeah, let's go with that. Fuck that weak moment of complete honesty I just had.
Randomize