The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
Ok. In one sink is a hairdrier. Still plugged in. The other is filled with broken glass. What do I do?!
Nvm. Bloody hand trumps dead. Also, where is gauze.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
...Then she just started hitting me with a loaf of bread.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Boobs are also good for catching the vodka gummy bears that miss my mouth
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
Watching a bear prancing around in a tiara is worth a loss of bar time.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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