SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
i fucked a milf yesterday.
i'm not impressed, in this generation that could technically mean a 16 year old.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Also, not pregnant! Way to go uterus! Good job on being a team player!
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
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