3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
My main thought on the Olympics: I need LESS cowbell.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
If I wanna spend the whole night tied up and getting railed I'm allowed to do so
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