Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
She brought an overnight bag to my party. Might as well have shown up wearing only a thong and a bottle of whip cream in her hand.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
How do you tell a vegan you want him to stuff you like a turkey?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
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