If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them
Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
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