DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
do i respond to the booty call for the guy with the bigger dick or the one who has the gourmet coffee i like so much? at this point i'm leading toward the coffee
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
Randomize
