Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
It's 10am. I'm hungover wearing a flyers jersey and a phillies hat and eating a cheesesteak. I'm not the only one. Best city ever.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
My Mom printed off all of my Augusts text messages. Apparently I've been drinking WAY too much and having an intermediate drug problem. I have to go home everyw weekend for the rest of the semester
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
Randomize
