Yah man, that place is surreal
Man, I'm from Tennessee. What the fuck is surreal?
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I woke up covered in his pee. And then he poked me on Facebook.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
