why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
On an unrelated note, i found out who duct taped shoelaces to my face
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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