We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
The time stamp on this text message is reason enough alone to not leave me unsupervised
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Randomize
