You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
i'm not saying you're gay. i'm just saying all my gay friends think you have a great ass.
Thinking of someone think of me while masturbating while I masturbate. & that's how the over thinkers do it ✌️
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Randomize
