I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I just imagined myself as R2-D2 and you as C3P0 walking around the Vegas desert looking for alcohol
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
He came over and fucked me while my conference call was on mute. Working from home is the best.
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