these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Women are like Alzheimers patiens. You can compliment them a million times in a day, but the next day is always a wash, you have to start all over.
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
he was making out with her against the stove and started a fire--the thirst literally almost burned the place down!!
No. You're getting a Viking funeral and I'm pawning your shit.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
Randomize