Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
She just used a turkey baster to transfer alcohol from the glass to the bottle. Just thought you should know
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Randomize
