whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Randomize
