Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
i saw like six of her guido cousins in the jersey shore trailer alone. her family is having a dinner party for the premiere tonight.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
It's okay though. My mom didn't believe that they were mine cuz they were magnums. Having a surprisingly large penis ftw
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
The guys are trying to figure out my orientation....think theyve settled on "drunksexual"
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
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