All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
you woulda been proud of me tonight though. i only made out with 2 guys. and in my defense one of them was to get a job after graduation.
Oh, and that ugly chick transformed into a veritable goddess when she came back at 3AM with a handle of vodka and 100 chicken wings
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Nothing like drunkenly buying a pregnancy test at 8 am to get out and realize your nip was out the whole time.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
He is a real estate investor who’s face I’m going to sit on.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize