i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
My internship group is made up of all freshman. Their enthusiasm for education and social interaction sickens me.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
I'm eating cereal out of a cocktail shaker. That kind of blizzard.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
