I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
Fucked her within an inch of her life. Seriously. Don't choke bitches when they ask. Was way too drunk to be pulling that shit.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
if things do not go as planned you should see me walking down I81 blindfolded and pantless
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Randomize
