I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
Swine flu is the new snow day.
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
him crossdressing on the weekends is awkward but not a deal breaker for me.
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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