I'm pretty sure my roommate has taken plan B more times than i've had sex. Not sure how that makes me feel.
let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
The Medal of Honor you banged could be at the inauguration today. You really dropped the ball on keeping up with that one.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Yeah, we agreed, but I feel like I need at least one more ride on the bonecoaster
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
