We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Really stoned
just sent my roommate on a cheese run
you know you should just kill yourself when you are helping your 16 year-old sister get ready for a date and you're going out to dinner with you parents..
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
When I was in the bathroom and wiped with a paper towel I found in the trashcan, I realized that this might be the reason I have a yeast infection.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
I have commenced my lesbian college experimentation. Wish me luck
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
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