Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
I had the hottest doctor assess me at the hospital. He smelled like heaven and sex.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
I went to the nurse and she literally told me I was too sexually active and wrote me a prescription for 7 days of pelvic rest...... Hahahhahaha
Randomize
