People with herpes should wear stickers.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
It's the kind of dick you travel across the country for
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
