I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He said finals are more important than getting stoned on 4/20. I'm proud in a disappointing kinda way
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Beard. Chest hair. Job.
The holy trinity.
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
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