you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
The great part about clubs is that you can fart everywhere and nobody knows! The bad part is I'm on e and i have nobody to fondle.
Just used my eyelash curler to open a bottle of cider...
I tried getting kicked out of my favorite bar. No matter what I did, I could do no wrong
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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