My astrological sign? Vagitarius.
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Im dating a 38 year old who's lap I can fit in. Tell me I don't have daddy issues.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
its times like this i wish i didnt have a penis
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
