i puked in the mini-firdge
we don't have a mini-fridge?
bought one. it ws too cheap to pass up. xcept now there's puke in it,,, but the freezer's fine so i feel pretty good about that
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
Helping high family members not look retarded is what family is for
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
The toilet wouldn't flush at the club so I literally just shat in the garbage.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I’m pregaming Christmas shopping with grandma. What’s up?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
