Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
Our lady landlord called. Dot worry, I handled it. Drunk. Tell her it was Nate. Done. Good. Bye. Drunk.
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize