Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Ate his Chinese food and drank his beer and played with his chihuahua. All while wrapped in a towel while he was sleep.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
