he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
just watched my roommates get stoned and jury rig a pulley system to pass the bowl back and forth across the room.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize