help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Today will be the day I throw up in my backpack in the middle of class
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
Randomize
